Job Candidate: The Bipolar Narcoleptic with Fibromyalgia?

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." I end every article with this quote from Gandhi. It's a mantra of mine and I do my best to keep it at the forefront of my actions. But would you change your mantra and, by extension, your actions if you realized it was hurting your chances finding employment?

Over the last two years I've been diagnosed with fibromyalgia, narcolepsy, and bipolar II. I have used ChickOpinion for the last year as a platform to educate people about what these conditions are and how they affect the people who have them. It's my goal to help people who have these conditions cope better with them, and to help people without these conditions learn more about them. Only through education will people truly have compassion. 

I have never been shy about talking about these conditions. It has been my experience that the best way to educate people is to be honest and open about what I go through on a daily basis, so that, hopefully, they can learn from me. More than anything, I want to help people. This has been an uphill battle for me for almost two years now. If I can make that battle easier for someone else, I'll do whatever it takes.

These conditions come with massive stereotypes:

• Fibromyalgia - in pain, lazy, unaccountable
• Narcolepsy - lazy, unsafe, unreliable
• Bipolar II - crazy, unstable, depressed

You don't realize that you're being put into these stereotypes until you take a step back and look at the big picture. For me, my biggest moment of realization came last week when I was mulling over my job situation. Before my diagnoses, I was offered every job I applied for. In the last year, I've applied to over 80 positions, gotten 1 interview, and am still unemployed. I can't prove anything when it comes to discrimination or prejudice in hiring committees, but if you Google my name, you see "fibromyalgia" and "bipolar" first. 

I have done my best to embody my mantra and be the change that I wish to see in this world. I want to give hope to people who don't have a clue how to start living after their diagnoses. I want to make having a neurological condition socially acceptable. I want to be seen as who I am, not as the sum of my conditions. Instead, employers just see a liability.

I am going to continue to talk about all of these conditions, because not enough people speak up. 

I am never going to hide my conditions out of fear, because that only perpetuates the silent spiral of ignorance. 

I am going to be stronger than someone who has never faced conditions like these, because I will not give up.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." --Gandhi

Are You Defined By Your Diagnosis?

Today I was watching "Good Morning America" (people who think I'm one-note, please keep reading; this isn't a political post) and Catherine Zeta-Jones was on the show talking about the movie "Playing for Keeps." After talking about the new film, Elizabeth Vargas asked her about her bipolar disorder. Catherine said something that struck me: "I'm tired of talking about it. I never wanted to be the poster child for this. Everyone has their own thing and we all deal with it the best we can and then keep going."

I feel like even though Catherine Zeta-Jones doesn't want to be a spokesperson for bipolar disorder, just saying what she said will inspire people with bipolar disorder. She has it and is coping quite well. People who have bipolar disorder and are struggling will be able to see her success and be inspired to get their lives back on track.

I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia almost a year ago and narcolepsy six months ago. While I don't want to come across as a victim or define myself by my medical diagnoses, I feel like it is important to talk about it. I agree with Catherine in that playing a victim is not the way to handle it, and everyone has their own thing going on in their lives. I disagree with her, though, in that I think it's important to talk about it and raise awareness.

I have been on experimental medicine for the last month and am going off it next week. I can't wait! I feel like it's made me lose 20 IQ points, I can't focus on anything, and I've gained six pounds in a month. When I get my brain back, I'm planning on writing an e-book about being a young person with fibromyalgia. So many young women are being diagnosed with it and coping is incredibly difficult. I want to write the book to help people, not to whine.

When I was diagnosed in January and having a breakdown about it, my fiancé told me, "This is something that will make you stronger in the long run. Right now it feels like you're in the furnace, but you will come out a stronger person." It's so true. I feel like I'm on the cusp of getting out of this metaphorical furnace. It hurts every day and it will continue to be hard, but it's going to be okay.

Actually, it will be great. I won't settle for anything less.

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." --Gandhi