Election2012: The Invented Patois

Election season is full of anger, snide remarks, and arguments. But looking back, it's fun to see some of the most humorous things that were said. Invented words and sayings are some of my favorites.

We talked about numbers. I was told that I was part of the 99% back in 2011. But now in 2012, I'm apparently in the 47%. So, does that mean that next year I'll end up being in the 1%?! Sounds good to me...

Last summer we were concerned about hitting the "debt ceiling." Now we're worried about falling off the "fiscal cliff." How did we get toward the ceiling last year? Can we use that to keep us from falling off the cliff this year?

In the medical care debate we have RomneyCare vs. ObamaCare. No offense, but I wouldn't want either one of them bringing me chicken noodle soup. I want DoctorCare or MommyCare, if we're just being honest and making up sayings for what we want when we're sick!

The candidates made up words to describe each others' policies during the campaign. Obama described Romney's tax ideas as "Romney Hood"--Robin Hood in reverse. To me, Romney Hood sounds like a form of knighthood: the level to which all businessmen aspire.

A few weeks ago, Obama also mentioned "Romnesia:" the condition Romney's supporters must have had if they really forgot Romney's voting record. Romnesia sounds like a country:

"Once upon a time, in a far away land called "Romnesia," there was a King named Mitt. King Mitt had the six largest castles in all of Romnesia and the Knights of Romneyhood defended their ivory towers with a ferocity rivaled by none." I will leave you to imagine the ending of that story. Hint: the dragon called "Obama" and 51% of the peasants go after King Mitt, so he escapes to one of his other castles, where he will look longingly out the window for four years until the next election comes and gives him the kiss that turns him back into a candidate.

Romney came up with "Obamaloney," referring to Obama's rhetoric. Now, I'm not a connoisseur or anything, but I'm not sure an obamaloney and mayo sandwich would be very good; not to mention making meat like that is illegal in most states.

According to a lot of news networks, this race was "razor tight." What is razor tight? I am not the only one who asked this question. Stephen Colbert did, too:

The Colbert Report
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Humor is the best way to feel good, especially after an election as venomous as the one we just had. No matter what side you were on, please feel free to laugh at all of this. I know I did!

"Be the change you wish to see in the world." --Gandhi